Tommy Karr

Category: Humor

  • The Ceiling Fan Calamity: Day 2

    The saga continues. The next day I sprang out of bed.  The dream I had was revelatory!  Duh!  Just twist the fixture clockwise and it will be freed from its hold and pop loose!  I couldn’t believe I didn’t think of that the night before.  I also couldn’t believe that I had dreamt that my light…

  • The Ceiling Fan Calamity: Day 1

    The debacle began when NYC went from frigid temps to “cooking an egg on the sidewalk” overnight.  My room was a large set of windows along one wall and, while that allows for access to the air outside it doesn’t mean that said exterior air is any more soothing than the stifling atmosphere of my…

  • The Evolution of Passing Out on the NYC Subway

    The image above is a documentation of the evolving stages of passing out on the NYC subway. This happens almost every day.  Let’s walk through it. A man or woman enters the train, stumbling like a Roger Corman zombie, struggles towards a vacant (hopefully) seat and drops down with a thud, seemingly stunned by the…

  • The Thing Under the Bed

    At sometime after 3:00am this morning I woke up drenched in a frigid dread.  Something was wrong.  What was it? I sat up, tried to adjust me eyes to the darkness but realized it wasn’t my eyes that were upset.  It was my ears. Somewhere near me a faint tap-tap-tap was rapping.  I sat perfectly…

  • Things That Should Be Scheduled Better

    UPS Delivery Cable repair service Home maintenance Bug spray/Exterminator All of the above! Every single one of the above should be scheduled better by their respective service provider.  But let’s focus… Today I rushed home, praying that UPS hadn’t been to my apartment yet because I had been tracking my package all day – literally…

  • When Bad News Gets Funny… and Tweeted

    I’m currently obsessed with fictional Twitter accounts.  Creative tweeters like GodDamnBatman and DrunkHulk are always good for a laugh and the recent Fwitter (that’s Fake Twitter to those not in the know… which is most of you since I just made that up) mayoremanuel is using Twitter to promote the fake Rahm’s wry sense of humor.…

  • Holy Golden Girls Batman!

    Back in January I helped my friends Addie Brownlee, Jill and Aileen put together a concert celebrating Dolly Parton‘s birthday. The show, featuring Addie along with her special guest Martha Wainwright, was a huge success and we all had an amazing time reliving some of Dolly’s most memorable hits. Cut to today when Jill (who…

  • Subway Moments: The Mumbly Guy and the Zombie Apocalypse

    My commute this morning was longer than the usual 25 minute ride due to some malfunction between 72nd and 59th Streets. So for 20 minutes we sat there waiting in the darkened tunnel for something, anything, to happen. Most of this time I spent reading Kathy Griffin’s book but part of my mind was paying…

  • A Little Tree Goes a Long Way

    I was pretty bummed at not having a Christmas tree this year.  It is such an iconic piece of the holidays and yet, because of time, money, moving, etc., I just decided this year… no tree. I accept that not having a tree is a failure on my part to get into the spirit but…

  • Terror at the Theatre (or Swings with Wings – thanks Ash!)

    In the 1999-2000 season, I was cast as a swing in Tapestry: a Review Based on the Music of Carole King at the Clarence Brown Theatre back home in Knoxville, Tennessee.  My female swing-counterpart was one of my best friends, Ashley. I’m not sure if you’ve ever been a swing before but they are typically…